10 Ways to Make Rejection Work for You

Those of us in the publishing industry (and those of us who just live life every day) have to deal with rejection. Yes, my writer friends, agents and editors face rejection just as regularly as you do. (See my previous post “Editors Are People Too.”) So I thought it would be good to talk about the elephant in the room and deal with it head on. Many times we overcome the fear of rejection and walk right in with our ideas, but what we don’t get rid of is the residue of rejection on the way out—the bitterness or low self-worth that is left over from the rejection.

If you don’t handle rejection properly, your filter can get clogged. Before you know it, you become jaded, cynical, frighteningly sarcastic (which can be a symptom of anger and passive aggression), fearful, apathetic, and even desperate toward the next opportunity presenting itself. This is when you’ve turned the residue of rejection into self-sabotage.

So here are ten ways I think you can completely filter out the negative residue of rejection to find yourself coming out on top.

How to Really Make an Editor Mad

This really has very little to do with editorial mechanics, publishing trends, or book queries. What this has to do with is way more important than any of that junk. This is about how other publishing professionals introduce editors to outsiders.

Whoa-ho, does it make me angry when someone brings a guest around to our department and says, “OK, Mr. Johnson, in here we have Jevon Bolden, one of our editors. She makes sure words are spelled correctly and commas are in place…” Instantly, a dark shadow is cast over my genuine friendliness and I am forced to endure the rest of the introduction with a frozen smile. I don't even hear anything else being said.

I do what?!

No, sir or madam, I am much more than a spell-checker and comma-keeper! You don’t even know what I do for you here!

Do you want to know the truth of what I do? Do you? I don’t think you really do. You can’t handle the truth!

Fine. Let me put it to you this way:

Editors Are People Too

Just sitting here thinking over what was asked of me during our scheduling meeting this morning, and I must admit to having some butterflies. I am pitching two books I found at a writers’ conference earlier this year at our next acquisitions meeting. Being a developmental editor (not an acquisitions editor), this is my first time in seven years accompanying one of my book ideas to an acquisitions meeting. In the past, I’ve come up with ideas and prepared proposals, reviewed and approved or denied submissions, and redeveloped backlist titles that were taken in by the managing editor or editorial director. But now it’s time for me to go deeper and take my ideas in myself, and I am excited about the prospects.

The interesting thing I’ve noticed is that writers get the impression that editors are emotional bricks—cold and lacking empathy toward a writer’s journey to publication. I remember writers approaching me with much trepidation—some even cried—at my last writers’ conference. Let me assure you that editors are people—not evil book cyborgs. We actually know first-hand what a querying writer goes through—on some level.

In a few weeks, I will be taking some ideas to a team of people who usually say no. Not because that’s their favorite word, but because there are so many variables and combinations of variables to ensuring a successful book. I am going to this meeting knowing this. Then not only that, but also what if my pitch is missing some important element, how will they view me as an editor? Will they think I don’t have my ear to the ground of what’s hot and what’s not in the industry? Will they wonder what the heck have I been doing with my time? Will they question if I am a value to the team or just taking up space? And yet even more, will they tell me so to my face? See, editors face rejection and have insecurities too.